


Lance McClain's Fanfiction Writing Adventures

by Apprehensive_Fictionists



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: M/M, Multi, Wow, i am suffering, please help me
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-02-20
Updated: 2017-03-05
Packaged: 2018-09-25 18:08:00
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,822
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/9836960
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Apprehensive_Fictionists/pseuds/Apprehensive_Fictionists
Summary: Lance, while "happening upon" Allura reading something called 'fanfiction' decides that he should do some writing of his own in his journal. From laughing over terrible pairings he came up with to complaining about his life to pining over a certain someone, Lance writes of it all. Little does he know that what started out as a cure for boredom and romantic frustration might actually turn out to be the cause of the turning point in his love life.





	1. Entry 1 - I Have An Idea!

**Author's Note:**

> Lance has just had an idea, and, well, we all know what happens when Lance has an idea. Look forward to the mess ahead!  
> \- Tsuki

Kay, so, here’s the deal. The other day, I was definitely  _ not _ stalking Allura around the ship, at all, but – bam! – it happened that I came across her reading in the castle control room. It was at around the usual time that she goes there that I’m definitely  _ not _ aware of in any kind of way. Haha, what a coincidence, right? Anyways, she was reading, being all cute, and I totally  _ didn’t _ stealthily peak over her shoulder like a badass ninja to see if she was reading something about me - because  _ that _ would be _ completely _ ridiculous – but, rather, just so happened to catch a glimpse of what she was so caught up in.

 

 I’m incredibly intelligent, as you must already know, so she must have been reading some really weird alien shit, y’know? Because, like, part of the title wasn’t even an English word? It wasn’t Altean, I’m pretty sure, because I know what that stuff looks like. The first part of the title was ‘Klance’, and, well, I don’t know, I guess it was just too stupid of a language for someone of my intelligence to be able to get, right? Although I’m definitely  _ not _ complaining about my name being a part of the word, for some reason, the ‘K’ in the beginning kinda pisses me off. Anyways, the other part of the title was definitely in English. ‘Fan fiction.’ 

 

 I don’t know what kind of strange stuff Allura was reading, and I’m maybe a  _ little _ concerned for her mental condition, but? I got to thinking? ‘Fan fiction’ is, like, a fan writing stuff about something they’re interested in, right? Like, uh, I dunno, kinda like a Star Wars spinoff? Glorious series like that are usually made by fans, I’ve heard. Anyways, I was thinking; since fans can write fictional stuff about characters they like, I figured I should try to do something like that, because, you know, I’m such a great and amazing person that anyone would  _ love _ reading something I write, no matter what it is, right? I’m a really romantic, sensual person, so, I figured I should go for the good ole’ romance genre, right? I was trying to come up with ideas about who, specifically to write about, and then, it hit me!

  
_ Me! _

 

 I mean, come on, if anyone’s gonna write anything about something, it should obviously be about me? I’m amazing in every possible way! I’m also popular with  _ all _ of the ladies, which is pretty much the most obvious thing in the world, haha. I actually kinda wanna write fanfiction about all of my friends with each other, both because I like some of the pairings and for laughs. But I wanna start out with something easy, for practice purposes, so, it looks like my first chapter is definitely going to be about me and... Allura! Not for any particular reason, though, because it’s not like I have a crush on her or anything, haha… She’s just the only girl in the castle-ship. 

 

 If anything, she’d be the one to have a crush on me? She’s always giving me these looks. They’re very passionate and full of admiration - of course. To be honest, though, that’s the least I expect from  _ anyone _ , so I guess they’re not all that special, haha. Besides, Keith - he’s this asshole who’s also on our ship, unfortunately - is always telling me that Allura pretty much feels everything  _ but _ attraction for me. Maybe… maybe he’s right, for once? I might exaggerate a lot - both in real life and here, where no one else can see - but I like to think I’m a decent person? My looks aren’t amazing, and neither is my personality, but I show a lot of confidence, at the very least.  _ Mamá _ always used to tell me that confidence is what people like most to see in others.  _ La confianza es muy importante, Lance. Es lo que hace que la gente hermosa a los ojos de los demás… _

 

Well, anyways! Even if she doesn’t have a crush on me, despite how good of a guy I am, I think I’ll be nice and totally write some romantic fan fiction about us! I’m such a great person, aren’t I? Haha, here we go!

 

_ Chapter 1 _

 

 Lance is a really awesome, great guy. Everyone knows this, therefore, everyone loves him. Allura is probably the person who loves him most among them. Like, if there is anyone who loves Lance more than anything in the entire world, it’s definitely her. 

 

 So, like, every time she looks at him, she gets these butterflies in her stomach - those little shits go crazy, okay, like, no joke, that’s how great he is - and when they accidentally touch, she blushes like Ryan Reynolds just confessed his undying love for her (If you don’t know who Ryan Reynolds is, you’re  _ not _ human, okay, _ I disown you _ as being a part of my species. Actually, if you’re not human, you shouldn’t be able to read this? I just realized that you _ might _ be an alien and that was kinda rude. Sorry, it’s okay if you don’t know who he is if you’re not human. Unless you  _ are _ . Then  _ shame _ on you.).

 

 One day Lance is just going around, being cool and amazing and stuff, y’know, as usual, and he decides he wants to go get some video games because he’s bored, also as usual, and he literally runs into Allura. She, like, falls and her eyes are all wide and everything, and she’s about to hit the ground when Lance, smooth motherfucker that he is, catches her. He’s grinning and stuff, looking like he’s some kind of Greek god or possibly like he’s off of the cover of some ‘Sexiest Man Alive’ magazine, and Allura is all blushing and stuttering, to which Lance is like ‘man, that’s so adorable, like, damn, who  _ is _ this cutie?’ 

 

 They have this moment where they’re gazing into each others’ eyes and like, fall in love at first sight. Allura is fucking swooning, okay, like, she  _ already _ liked him, but now she’s gone with the wind. Lance, being all romantic, as usual, effortlessly lifts her back up and onto her feet, and her little alien friends are all giggling behind her and stuff.

 

 “That was  _ almost _ really bad, y’know. You’re so lucky I was here to catch you,” Lance says smoothly, and Allura blushes her face off.

 

“O-Oh, um, thank you, Lance,” and, like, Lance is swooning because  _ fuck, that accent is somehow both really cute and really hot at the same time??? _ And then he just kinda says “fuck it” and asks her out to go get coffee, which she replies with an enthusiastic yes to, because who  _ wouldn’t _ , right? 

 

 Lance and Allura chat each other up over coffee and they’re having like, a really great time, because, why the hell not? I mean, like, they have so much fun that Allura gives Lance her number at the end of it all and he’s like “fuck yeah, score!” So, after that they go on a couple more dates and start texting and talking over the phone, and Lance is being super romantic and cheesy, but Allura likes that and is able to deal with his shit because he’s overall just a really great person to be with. Which is a given, obviously, but I thought it was worth mentioning.

 

 Then, one day, Allura pretty much invites him to go get coffee again and admits her feelings for him, blushing and being all cute and shit, as usual, and  Lance is like “oh, yeah, I’ve got feelings for you too, babe, ever since we first started talking and stuff.” Everything’s great and they’re both really happy, and Lance just kinda pulls a smooth move out of thin air and kisses her in a totally  _ not _ awkward way because he’s amazing; he basically carries her out of the coffee shop ( _ after _ paying for the coffee, though, because, y’know, no matter how happy and awesome you are, you still have to pay for things; like, people put effort into making that stuff and they should be paid for it, right?) and off into the sunset. Like I said, he’s one smooth motherfucker. 100% respect and love and awe and admiration for Lance Mcclain, thanks.

 

Oh, yeah, that’s the end of it, by the way.

 

P.S. I reread this and it’s so good that I’m considering becoming a professional romance writer. Like,  _ wow, _ do I have the skills to pay the bills, or what? I’m  _ definitely _ going to start writing more of this “fan fiction.” I’m gonna start working on the next one, like, right away. Bye, keep it real till I’m back with more awesome ideas! ;) 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'll take requests, possibly? I have already tagged what pairings I want to include in Lance's misadventures, but if there's some other ship you want to see him write about, feel free to let me know about it so I can consider it! :)   
> Also, there will always be an entry or two that Lance has written before he gets into actually writing a story, depending on what happens. I just wanted to let you guys know, for awareness purposes. ^^


	2. Entry 2 - Today Is Just Not My Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Lance isn't having a very good day and decides to do a little writing to vent and get his mind off of it. Let's just say he is definitely successful in his endeavor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, Lance. My poor, poor Cuban son. I don't know whether to say "I'm sorry" or "you're welcome".  
> Help me please-  
> \- Tsuki

 Have I ever confided in you, journal dearest, about how much I _hate_ Keith Kogane? No? Okay, great, fantastic:

 

**_HE'S A PIECE OF FUCKING SHIT, OKAY, LIKE WHAT THE FUCK IS HIS PROBLEM, HUH?_ **

 

 As I’m absolutely, positively certain you already know: I’m a _great_ guy! I’m cool, amazing, awesome, handsome! Right? Yes? So why the  _ hell _ is everything about  _ him _ _?_ Why the _hell_ does he have to act like he’s got some kind of personal vendetta against me, huh? What did I  _ ever _ do to him? Nothing! So why the  _ fuck _ am I getting treated like a useless piece of  _ shit _ \- even if I just might possibly be one - while he gets to ride on the fucking clouds and greet the sun, moon, and stars like some kind of big shot all the time?

 

 Ugh… Okay, so, I guess I should explain why I’m so pissed or else this is all just going to seem stupid. Today we went on this really amazing mission, right? We couldn’t form Voltron immediately ‘cause these alien dudes just completely outnumbered us and wouldn’t let us rest for a moment long enough to do it. So, basically, Allura was all “oh no, woe is us, we need to take out the main fleet fast or else the castle will be destroyed,” as fucking usual. And, of course, we were trying to step up to it as fast as we could, y’know, because we’re the defenders of the fucking universe! Shiro comes up with this strategy where Hunk, Keith, and I cover for Pidge and him as they sneak into the main ship and take out the control room, or something, and we were doing just fine; Pidge and Shiro had totally taken it out so that the energy and comms systems were down and shit. I totally had a straight shot to be able to end the whole charade - and this is the part that ruined everything - when Keith fucking Kogane decides he’s gonna fuck himself over with a cactus blindfolded before he lets me do anything of value that would make me not completely useless. He slices through the ship like it’s goddamn butter, like he doesn’t even know I exist,  _let alone_  that I was going to take the shot. I even _said_ I was going to! Everyone else even agreed like “yeah, sure, okay Lance,” in their we-don’t-know-that-he-can-actually-detect-sarcasm kind of way!

 

 Okay, so maybe that wasn’t the best agreement in the world... but it was still something? I mean, Hunk usually has my back, so, maybe his “yeah, sure, okay Lance,” wasn’t sarcastic. Still... I could never say this out loud - maybe that’s why I’m writing it - but, sometimes, I wish they’d respect me the way they respect each other. Or at least have a little more faith in me? We’re supposed to be a team, right? I want to be and to feel like I’m someone important, someone vital, too. I want to have some kind of crazy awesome destiny, or turn out to be partly some other kind of alien race, like Keith. That would be awesome. I guess it doesn’t matter, though, right? I can be confident in my abilities, right? I’m reliable in situations that matter… I can shoot pretty well, in my own opinion. I have good qualities. They’re… just not the  _ best _ . And probably never will be, if we’re being realistic, haha.

 

 Wow, haha, that was depressing. Damnit, since when did it occur to me to think writing in pen would be a good idea? Well, if you’re not me and you’re reading this: first of all, what the fuck, dude, how about some privacy? Secondly, just ignore all of that, please. I just needed to rant a little and then all that depressing stuff was me trying to mimic Keith, everyone's favourite emo, edgy overlord. Convincing, right? I’m a damn good writer, I know, no need to tell me. Anyways, since I know you probably had a hell of a time reading that, how about I give you guys another blessing and write some more fan fiction? Yeah? Yeah!

 

  I actually told Hunk about my amazing story and he was all, “dude, that’s so great, you should write something for me,” and I was all, “yeah, bro, I’ll totally hook you up!” And then he was like, “wait, wait... is it gonna be with you, like the one you wrote? Because, uh, I don’t know that I-” and I cut him off like, “oh my god, Hunk, you have a crush on me? I should have seen it coming, I mean, I _am_ a blessing to this Universe. Don’t worry, I’ll definitely write something for us, it’s gonna be amazing. Trust me,” and then he was like, “Lance, no, plea-” but I cut him off again and started walking back to my room like, “It’s okay, I won’t tell anyone!” And the last thing I heard him say was, “Lance, I fucking hate you!”  We all know he was just in denial, though, when he said that. Are you ready for some of this? Because I totally am. I was born ready! Fuck, this is going to be hilarious, I’m already dying.

 

_   Chapter 2 _

 

 So, Hunk and Lance are best bros, okay? They’re like the best of bros of the best of bros, and that’s a really hard status to attain. Like, if Lance is Mario, then Hunk had better be fucking Luigi because Mario ain’t havin’ none of that sorry-we-ran-out shit today, okay. So, yeah. Bros. Two bros, chillin’ in Hunk’s bedroom, five feet apart ‘cause they’re not gay. Yeah.

 

 Speaking of Mario and Luigi, though, they’re playing Mario Kart 8, because that game is (was, actually, because space is fucking _lame_ [just kidding, I love space] and Allura’s magic castle-ship won’t let Pidge and me nerd out, ever) amazing and anyone who says the title is worn out can go choke on my dusty, old, unused ACT Prep Guide from 10th grade because, guess what? _No one_   _cares_. (Wow, okay, I got caught offtrack there, haha.) Yeah, so, they’re playing Mario Kart 8 when all of the sudden Hunk just looks over at Lance - he doesn’t even bother to pause the game, okay, that’s how caught up in this he is, so Lance is busy winning the game because of his folly like the smooth motherfucker he is.

 

 “Bro have you ever thought about fucking me or something?” he bluntly asks (good ole' Hunk) and Lance just about chokes on air and dies coughing, which is funny. Y’know. ‘Cause it’s supposed to keep you alive. Aahahaha…

 

 “Dude, what the fuck?” Lance is still trying to catch his breath and all and  _ fuck _ his face is as red as the color itself- 

 

 “Well, I mean, I’m just asking. Like, it just kinda occurred to me? You’re pretty much the only person I hang out with anymore, so. I dunno.” Now, Lance isn’t gay. But, for the sake of this story, let’s just say that he has considered it. Not gay, but considering. Never actually gay, haha. (Fuck, this is getting weird. I kinda want to stop here. But I’m no chicken! I’m gonna see this through. Fuck, okay. Shit-)

 

 “UhH. Well, um. Maybe? I mean, I thought about it once, haha. But I’m not gay, so... Haha… Hah…” Of course he isn't - regardless of what happens! (Aaaahhh, _help-_ )

 

 “Y-Yeah, me neither! It was, uh, just another one of my crazy questions... Haha…” Things are silent and awkward and stuff. Until, like, they aren’t anymore. Because (let it be known!!!) Lance isn’t a pussy. 

 

 “...Wanna fuck?”

 

 “Why the hell not?”

 

 And so they did.

 

  Fuck, okay, that’s all you’re getting.  _ No way _ I’m going into detail because then I won’t be able to think of Hunk the same way ever again. I  _ will not _ sexualise my bro. Okay, someone _desperately needs_ to add this rule to the bro code. Fuck, I’m so confused right now. Was this a good idea? Yes. Yes it was. Lance McClain only has good ideas and does not have second thoughts and feels awkward about nothing. Haha… Ha…

  
_ Hunk I’m so sorry please forgive me- _

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh boi.  
> Ohhhhh boi.  
> What is this beautiful masterpiece? I never stop admiring Lance, he never ceases to amaze me.

**Author's Note:**

> I'll take requests, possibly? I have already tagged what pairings I want to include in Lance's misadventures, but if there's some other ship you want to see him write about, feel free to let me know about it so I can consider it! :)  
> Also, there will always be an entry or two that Lance has written before he gets into actually writing a story, depending on what happens. I just wanted to let you guys know, for awareness purposes. ^^  
> 


End file.
